Free classic Toyland poster with today's Express!

READERS OF TODAY'S TOYLAND EXPRESS will get a free pull-out poster of all the characters of Toyland in June 2006. The classic photo is a heartwarming memory of times gone by and features everyone from Mrs Dalmation to Barbie.

Missing slipper found!

FURTHER TO A TOYLAND EXPRESS CAMPAIGN to find Ducky's missing slipper which he lost last week, success has resulted. The slipper was found under Daddy's pillow, where it must have slipped (hee hee!) off the Bostonian duck's feet. Ducky is two years old.

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Fundraiser raises funds

MOST OF TOYLAND WERE GLUED TO their television sets last night to watch the Toyland Network's biannual fundraising programme Little Toys in Need. The show, presented by Marissa Cooper and 94 year old Jeff Badger, aims to encourage people to donate to the charity in various ways, the money being spent on the Smallvania Nursery, which provides care and homes for many children and orphans.

The star of the show was of course the big Winnie the Pooh, who wears a trademark white sleeve with red dots on it over his eye, while smiling endlessly in his yellow fur. He danced around the stage with a bucket which people filled up with various coins and cheques.

The show, starting on the Toyland Network at 2 o'clock in the afternoon yesterday, went on until 6.30am this morning, non-stop. It featured a variety of entertainment. Nazzy Star sung the official Little Toys in Need charity single, entitled 'The Greatest Love of All', a cover version of a George Benson song. The song contains the appropriate lines 'I believe the children are our future,
Teach them well and let them lead the way '. Critics said Nazzy was simply using the charity to try and restart her failing singing career, which ended some years ago.

Other highlights included King Chris volunteering to have custard pies thrown at his face, and Jonathan Bramble sitting in a bath tub full of Bramble Baked Beans. Sabrina Spellman performed a few magic tricks and even King Cheeky of Boston donated an old portrait of himself to be sold to raise money.

Also part of the show, the new voice of the Toyland Speaking Clock was announced. The competitors were Lizzie McGuire, Queen Spurry of Smallvania, Sabrina Spellman, Natalie Star, and the only male competitor, postman Ryan Atwood. Ryan won the honour, with many voters saying they chose him because all of the other competitors had the same voice.

'Wawww I'm delighted to be the new voice of the Speaking Clock! Wawww just dial 123 and you'll hear me tell you "Waww at the first beep, the time will be waww! 12.24 and 3 seconds exactly!"'

Mrs Dalmation, who runs the Toyland Nursery, said she was hugely thankful for the kindess of everyone in Toyland who donated to the appeal.

TE

Missing slipper!

DUCKY MALLARD has lost one of his new slippers, it emerged last night. The slipper is believed to be buried somewhere under the mountains of pillows and covers of Emily's bed, where Ducky lives.

'He's not lost it, he's just mislaid it!' said Mrs Ducky, Ducky's mother, wearing bright red lipstick.

Toyland policeman Elmo has appealed for anyone with any information regarding the whereabouts of the missing slipper to contact him immediately.

IN OTHER NEWS
Whitey due back today
North Pole 'not hot' shock

Winnie spends night away shock

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WINNIE THE POOH, Mayor of Boston, caused shock by sleeping in Mummy's bed last night, it has emerged.

The biggest toy of Toyland usually resides at the foot of Emily's bed, rarely performing his function as a hot water bottle cover. But that's just what he was used for when Emily's Mummy wanted something warm to cuddle up to in Daddy's absence in Boston, USA.

This left Ducky as the only toy on the bed. 'I wasn't lonely though,' said the soft duck, who had the company of the royal family of Boston above his head on a ledge, and the Jellycat dolls in a flat on a shelf next door.

Ducky in fact had a late night as he was in London for the premiere of his latest film, James Pond : Quacksino Royale. The film tells the story of how the fictional duck became a superspy with a fondness for bread eaten in a pond - 'thrown, not dropped.' Top Toyland celebrities at the premiere included pop singer Nazzy Star, seventies soul singer Hershey Bear, and more international toy stars such as Buzz Lightyear. Mrs Potatohead was also present, but she declined to say where her husband was. Tabloid rumours suggest their marriage is mashed up.

King Cheeky bemoaned the fact that both Winnie and White Teddy were sleeping away last night. 'I say, Boston seems so quiet with out them!' Fortunately, Marissa Cooper was on hand playing loud music through her CD player until two o'clock in the morning.

'I just wasn't tired! I miss Whitey!' she wailed.

Winnie the Pooh was back in Toyland today to carry on his job as Mayor.

TE

Lemonade all round!

RESIDENTS OF TOYLAND have voted lemonade their favourite drink, a new YouDrink poll concluded.

Asked the question 'If you could have any drink, which drink do you think would be the best drink to drink?', an overwhelming nine out of ten participants answered 'lemonade'.

The poll was sent out to all toys by the Barry Bramble Enterprises Ltd, the corporation that owns various sites in Smallvania including the department store, juice stand and library. Founder Barry Bramble is expected to immediately start selling more lemonade and for a higher price.

Lemonade has historically been seen as the only drink all toys and children alike love, especially since its main rival, ginger beer, fell out of fashion in the late nineteenth century. Lemonade is frequently referred to in popular bedtime stories ranging from the 'Wishing Chair' series by Enid Blyton to the Little Owl and Little Squirrel stories.

On news of the announcement, the price of shares in Toyland Coca Cola Co fell dramatically. Mrs Mouse, who works for Barry Bramble, had an interesting theory on the result however.

'Do the toys mean they like traditional lemon juice and sugar, or do they mean these modern fizzy Sprite stuff?' she asked.

Mayoress of Smallvania, Mabel Badger, said she disapproved of fizzy lemonade. 'It rots your teeth something rotten,' she exclaimed while sucking on a peppermint, and offered any children to come round to her house if they wanted to try some real lemonade.

The poll offers no clues as to which type of lemonade the toys actually like.

Toys who did not choose lemonade as the drink which they would most like to drink if they'd like a drink included King Chris, who said he'd have a Castle Lager any day, and Queen Nala, who said she'd prefer to go and dunk her lioness face in a pool of water if she was thirsty. Sabrina Spellman said she would prefer a barley leaf freshly pressed fruit smoothie with fully skimmed milk.

Ducky was asleep while this article was being written, but no doubt would have said he likes lemonade too. Ducky is two years old.

Whitey flies away on business trip

WHITE TEDDY, known affectionately to most of Toyland as White Teddy, yesterday made a surprise visit to Boston, Massachussets, USA. This city is not to be confused with Boston, Toyland, where Whitey lives. The flight lasted approximately six and a half hours, Whitey leaving from London with Emily's Daddy who was going on a business trip to Harvard University.

It is rumoured that Emily's Daddy had not planned to take Whitey, but that Emily encouraged Whitey to jump in the suitcase anyway. The event mirrors the famous Spain scandal of some years back where White Teddy and Shawly hid under the covers, camoflauged by their sheer whiteness, to avoid flying home from a holiday in Spain. They were later caught sunning themselves on a beach and were immediately posted back to Toyland.

Since then, Whitey has gained a reputation for being something of a rebel. His countless escapades have won him the affection of Marissa Cooper, his long time girlfriend.

'Oh he's such a sweetheart!' Marissa, 18, beamed. 'I will miss him SO MUCH but oh my goodness he will love Boston! I went there last year with Emily of course but he needs to experience it himself! I'm sure Harvard will offer him a place to study there! But he better not accept, he needs to come back and cuddle me in his soft, polar bear fur!'

Toyland has something of an affinity to Boston, USA, despite the two places being separated by the Atlantic Ocean. Toys such as Marshmallow, the barking pink poodle, were bought there. Ducky Mallard, two years old, spent his childhood wandering across the city in an adventure later popularised as a children's book. Finally, of course, when Toyland was divided into two parts, the big toys named their half Boston.

Whitey is expected to return home on Friday.

Toyland rocked by fireworks

THE TOYLAND SKY WAS lit up tonight by fireworks, celebrating Guy Fawkes day. The show was put on for free in Smallvania Square by King Chris and Queen Spurry.

Toffee apples and chocolate apples were on sale at the Barry Bramble Department Store which stayed open late to offer food to spectators. 'Burgers with onions, burgers without onions, hot dogs, glow-sticks, we have it all!' said Barry Bramble in the voice of a Victorian showman demonstrating his latest exhibit. With gusto he announced the ketchup was on the table to the right.

The local Parent-Teacher Association was on hand to add the onions to the said burgers, with Mrs Dalmation of the local nursery leading the other mothers.

It soon emerged however that the firework display was not to everyone's taste, when many of Toyland's woodland creatures and animals got frightened by the loud bangs and flashes. As soon as the display started, the cat Meow family ran inside to hide from the noise. Across the border in Boston, the Bostonian royal family could be seen covering their ears and trembling. Even the Dalmation family had to return home, leaving the burger stand prematurely closed.

As the many animals of Toyland either cheered with amazement or barked with terror, a human, Sabrina Spellman, reminded everyone that pets should be kept indoors on Bonfire Night.

TE

- The beginning of November also marks one year since the evil snail Princess Purple Spots tried to take over Toyland by attempting to burn down King Cheeky's Parliament in his pumpkin-mobile.