HIS ROYAL HIGHNESS KING CHEEKIUS POPSALOT SPOTS THE FIRST celebrated his 5th birthday to himself on Friday 1st August, Toyland residents only just realised yesterday. It is not at all the first time this has happened, due to Emily being on holiday without the King once again.
The first of August marks the date Cheeky arrived in Toyland, which was then not even named. He quickly established himself as King of the new kingdom which he has ruled ever since, joined by Queen Nala in 2004, and overcoming a brief phase from 2006 to 2007 where Smallvania declared itself independent. He is the only toy other than Ducky Mallard and local loudmouth Marissa Cooper and to have a consistently recognised birthday date.
A spokesman for Kensington Palace, the official residence of the entire royal family, said the King had celebrated privately with his family but wouldn't have minded at least a birthday card from Emily and the other toys. Cheeky is also believed to have said at least he didn't make a fuss like Prime Minister Nizz of the Land of Old Toys (Oldsville), who ordered a public procession two months ago despite running a very poor country.
'Eu. I have cooked King Cheeky a special birthday zebra steak,' said Bostonian chef Chris Steakface, proprietor of the Chris & Spurry Steakplace, upon realising his mistake. Relatively young, Chris Steakface only arrived in Toyland in April 2005, so has only been living here three and a half years. His human age is unknown as he is second hand, as shown by his loose threads.
'Wawww birthday cards started flooding my postal satchel from Saturday!' said postman Ryan Atwood.
'Excuse-me, local LOUDMOUTH?!' commented Cooper, 20, before adding 'Cooper? Has the Toyland Express gone off me or something? At least call me Coop or The Coopster. It's just cooler.' The Coopster will match Cheeky's five years at Christmas this year.
'My mummy has bought me a present to give to King Cheeky when I next see him,' said Ducky. Ducky is four years old.
Cheeky was seen sleeping in Emily's bed all weekend to celebrate being five human years old. Cheeky's Toyish age is 67.
The next birthday that toys might want to remember is Kaitlin Cooper, Toyish age nine, who has lived in Boston two years this October.
In other news...
Rare photo of baby Emily with Rosie uncovered
McKuchen working Wednesday and Saturday giving Toyland Tours
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