Lego bank goes bust

TOYLAND WAS IN SHOCK LAST WEEK when the entire of Lego City, and with it the Lego bank, was dismantled and taken away by Emily. Only one Lego character, Peter Wizard, remains.

The small settlement next to the dolls house was a banking powerhouse, being the only place to produce actual Dirham coins (Lego money) at the central bank. Early reports suggest the bank, which provided most of the Lego jobs, was at the centre of the meltdown.

'They just kept on producing gold Lego coins and lending money to whoever walked in the little red door,' explains the Express economics correspondent Canada Jack.

'How else do we explain a postman Bratz doll and a candyfloss seller owning a huge Georgian dolls house mansion? Or a hedgehog building an entire department store overnight? The Lego bank lent out this money and now people can't pay it back. It's better to just keep your money in the piggy bank now!'

A spokesman for the Piggy Bank welcomed this news and said they offered very competitive interest rates.

Lego City also had a small pizzeria which has been destroyed, reducing competition to the nearby Chris and Spurry Steakplace, but also reducing customers, as Lego people were among the only toys to actually fit into the restaurant, which is a converted CD rack.

King Cheeky said that Kensington Palace would now be printing all the money and that toys needn't worry.

Mayor Lucas of Smallvania sounded a more worried tone at a press conference on the steps of the Dolls' House.

'In under two weeks, Emily will be turning ten. This week we have seen a great part of Smallvanian culture brutally torn down by our owner. Toys will be worrying if this is the beginning of the end. I want to assure all toys that I am doing all I can to ensure Emily's birthday list is filled with toys that provide new storylines and hours of playtime in Smallvania and Boston.

'To those toys who say it's too late, we say we have hope. To those who say we can't do anything about the demise of Smallvania, we say, Yes We Can.'

TE