Latest news

Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Tiger bread renamed giraffe bread by Toyland supermarkets

SHOPS ACROSS TOYLAND have rebranded their popular 'tiger bread' loaf (retail price 1 dirum), after a letter a Born in Africa giraffe wrote to one bakery, saying the bread looked more like her, went viral.

The letter read: 'Why is tiger bread called tiger bread. Guys, I mean, come on guys. It obviously looks more like me, a giraffe. It's just stupid to call it tiger bread. I mean come on people. It just doesn't make sense. Love from, Joanna Giraffe.'

The author, a giraffe who lives in Kensington Palace with the other Born in Africa toys, found herself at the centre of popular opinion and the spotty snack has promptly been renamed. Joanna Giraffe has no specific job in Toyland but is understood to now be considering a career in marketing.

Toys' reaction has been generally positive about the move. Local bread aficionada and founder of the ill-fated 'Bread Club', Ducky Mallard, welcomed the change.

'Bread's bread. I don't really mind what it's called. But I'm pleased Joanna's happy,' she said.

Toyland's only Tiger, Chinese restauranteur Jang Wang, was unavailable for comment but is understood to be extremely angry.

King Cheeky, a cheetah, commented that he had long thought the loaf looked nothing like a tiger, but that there were 'other spotty options that everyone might like to think about.'

The King was then overheard instructing his chef Lapinou to 'bake up some Cheetah Loaf, and get it on the market, fast!'

'I personally advise you not to do this, Cheeky,' Marissa chimed in.

Ducky is 11 years old.

Pictured: a freshly baked Giraffe loaf.

Friday, January 13, 2012

Zachary and Chica think ahead to Character of the Year 2012

BRAND NEW CHARACTERS Zachary Bumpkin, a Build-a-Bear bunny, and Chica Gonzales are rumoured to already be contemplating success at the prestigious Character of the Year ceremony at the end of the year.

Every year, the best new character of the year is chosen from all arrivals since the Christmas before. The Character of the Year for 2011 was Mitzi Bumpkin, sister to Zachary.

Previous winners have included King Cheeky (2003), Ducky Mallard (2004) and Jimothy Bandersnatch (2010). All have gone on to be much loved by Emily. No character of the year has ever been sent to the loft or the Land of Old Toys after winning.

Zachary is a favourite for being soft and 'the perfect pillow', which Chica has established herself instantly as both a Jellycat bunch member and Sunnydale pupil.

Pictured: Zachary and Chica.

New character alert

TOYLAND WAS THRILLED TO INVITE its latest new character yesterday, as Chica Gonzales followed in the footsteps of her mother and arrived from eBay.

Chica, 12, joins the Jellycat bunch as twin sister to Chico and daughter to local schoolteacher, Catalina.

Pictured: the Gonzales family.